Dear Annie: I met a great gal. We seem really good together most of the time, but here’s the rub. She has a dog. It is a nice dog but not very well trained. The big problem is bedtime at my place. The dog wants to share our bed, and is uncontrollably insistent about it, whining and disturbing us throughout the night until she gives up and allows the dog to get in bed with us. I must deal with it or go sleep elsewhere.
Apparently, this dog gets to sleep with her at home, so hey, why not here? It ruins intimacy and makes it hard to sleep. She apologizes, but is doing nothing to train this dog to accept the floor as its dog bed. Am I out of line to want our bed dog-free? What does this say for our chances?
— Doggone it!
Dear Doggone It: Actions speak, or should I say bark, louder than words. It is time to have another conversation with your girlfriend about her dog. Sleeping in bed with your dog is a very personal decision. Studies have shown that it can be therapeutic for both the dog and owner.
But this depends on personal preference, and your preference is not to have the dog in bed while her preference is to have him with her. She may apologize for allowing the dog in bed, but her actions say that she loves having her four-legged friend near at night.
Tell her how you feel and see if you can come up with a compromise. Maybe buy the dog a nice bed. Or create a rule that the dog can only stay at the end of your bed. Regardless of the outcome, you need to have another conversation about it.